Apologies

hi folks!  Sorry I haven't been on the Blog for a while but I have been residing at the pleasure of Her Majesty in one of her Institutions.  I really should have learnt to pay my dues to the Establishment by way of taxes.  One can only stuff the matress with a certain amount from the shop's takings.  The wife had also been rather demanding of late, sort of sex in the morning, sex in the evening and sex at supper time!  I just can't manage these days and have had to resort to manipulating my penis pump to give her any satisfaction.  Mind you she always was easily turned on!  Oh shite she wants me to give her one now...... Back in about 2 minutes.
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A WELCOME BREAK

Well Folks, unless you are blind, you may have noticed that I have refrained from comment for some time now.  This has given me the chance to relax from the trials and tribulations of business, running my own Newsagency, and allowed me to enjoy time away with my lovely (well I think so) wife.  Apart from lots of Twittering I have been fairly quiet on the social media front, thereby giving the normal subjects of my abuse and slanderous comments a rest.
THAT IS ALL ABOUT TO CHANGE!
I have returned, revitalised, refreshed and ready to continue my onslaught on all people, but especially those I tormented on my original Thoughts of Oscar Blog.  Even my co-conspirators on that Blog, David Jones MP (until 8 June if he's lucky), Dylan Moore, Steve Davis and others are delighted to see my return and will no doubt be making their own contributions as in the past!

As we have seen David's boss has decided to go to the country, maybe David will take the similar step and remove himself to another place, preferably thousands of miles away, most people hope.  He has been a pain in my side for long enough and without his encouragement my reputation (what little I had) would have remained only slightly tarnished, instead of destroyed.

I am particularly upset that my bosom pals in the North Wales Police have been taking a well deserved trouncing from the Llandunoconwy blog, authored by that chap Windy Miller.  He hits the nail right on the head everytime he puts pen to paper, figuratively speaking.  He's quite right, our Police Force here in North Wales leaves much to be desired and unfortunately the good, if any exist, get tarnished by the reputation of the bad.

As yet no PP Candidates have been announced for the forthcoming election, but should David Ian Jones put himself forward, please think hard and long as to whether he deserves to be re-elected.  I know what I will do.
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ONE OF THE GANG

A tribute to my good friend Rube and her cousin who assisted in the early days of the Blog by providing certain information before it even hit the local papers.

The message is as apt as they come!  Definitely a MOUTH ALMIGHTY!

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POEM OF THE WEEK

    Remember, remember! 
    The fifth of November,
    The Gunpowder treason and plot;
    I know of no reason
    Why the Gunpowder treason
    Should ever be forgot!
    Guy Fawkes and his companions
    Did the scheme contrive,
    To blow the King and Parliament
    All up alive.
    Threescore barrels, laid below,
    To prove old England's overthrow.
    But, by God's providence, him they catch,
    With a dark lantern, lighting a match!
    A stick and a stake 
    For King James's sake!
    If you won't give me one,
    I'll take two,
    The better for me,
    And the worse for you.
    A rope, a rope, to hang the Pope,
    A penn'orth of cheese to choke him,
    A pint of beer to wash it down,
    And a jolly good fire to burn him.
    Holloa, boys! holloa, boys! make the bells ring!
    Holloa, boys! holloa boys! God save the King!
    Hip, hip, hooor-r-r-ray!

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BANGERS AND MASH

My good mate Dave has just reminded me that it is November the Fifth next week and Guido Fawkes and his crew will be pwowling around.   I, or should I say we, have not heard about any Blue touch paper yet.  If we do then , as per last year, we will go running off to our friendly Policemen and report it as a threat on our lives.  Mind you what sort of a Police force have we, when we see Officers from all ranks being prosecuted for sexual offences on children?   Does not give one any great feeling of confidence.
Maybe a few of them could do with a firwork up their jacksies.
Just hope that fireworks are banned from now on, I made my money out of them when I had a shop, but they are dangerous and nasty things.  One wonders how we can lock up the terror suspects when we happily provide the raw materials for them to make explosive devices!  Ban fireworks, me and the misses say.

I will be staying in until 1st November as I have already been accused of frightening children and adults for looking like a Halloween ghoul, and I don't even have a fancy dress on.  Made me realise just how very ugly I am.

Before I go, and a year having passed us by, I must apologise to Mr Windmill and his family for the trouble he had with the Constabulary due to the infamous "Blue touchpaper" comment on his Blog, when the actual author was me.   I am full of remorse as you may imagine, and the gang of four have thoroughly enjoyed watching the action over the past 12 months.  Just hope the local Force don't try to accuse us of wasting Police time, and will keep the very friendly relationship we have.

More fun to follow.
 Have a happy week.
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VACATION TIME

Not much happening at the moment, on holiday in my favourite place in Florida.  Just been hearing about the new laws about trolling and harrassment on the Internet.  I will have to be a bit cleverer from now on and use a few software tools to cover my tracks.   See you all later.
Here are just a handful of my various aliases, watch out for others yet to come!

Aberconwy2015, NigelRoberts1, Seagritter, iolomorgano, CSILlandudno, John Spicer, and all the other names used by my mates and other posters.  Nobody is going to catch up with me.

Not the Mrs but a welcome distraction.

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DAVID JONES MP

My old mate David Jones, erstwhile Member of Parliament for the Constiuancy of Clwyd West, does no seem to enjoy receiving email messages from folk as this standard reply would tend to indicate!   There was a time when MP's, Councillors and other Servants of the People were only to pleased to hear from individuals and would even take direct telephone calls to their homes!   Not any more though.   They all hide themselves behind the oberpaid staff of their Constiuancy office and are not really interested in direct exchanges with anyone.  

I have noticed that dear old Dave is being lambasted on another Blog, but if even half of what is written is true he deserves whatever he gets.  MP's should not be able to influence Police or the Judicial system, and certainly not have innocent citizens arrested for no reason whatsoever.  I realise now, that even I should not have partaken in the episode involving the joking comment about Guy Fawkes and the blue touch paper, that resulted in the total disruption to a well respected local family.   We all must have been crazy to think it was a threat on our lives.   November the fifth is just around the corner so maybe another jokey comment will appear and we will be able to get someone else arrested on a similar trumped up charge.

As many may be aware, despite the demise of other Blogs I have started, I will continue to do and say whatever I wish in the knowledge that the Police will not consider my comments offensive and will do nothing to stop me, or any of my fellow contributors such as David Jones.

According to an aquaintance this is the reply you will get from D J to any email.

IMPORTANT - PLEASE READ THIS RESPONSE CAREFULLY, ESPECIALLY THE SECTIONS IN BOLD PRINT

This is an automated response.

Thank you for your e-mail, which will receive attention as soon as possible.

I receive a large number of e-mails that emanate from organisations such as 38 Degrees.  In order to save resources, I post a standardised reply to such campaigns on my website: www.davidjones.wales until the heading “Campaigns”.  If, therefore, yours is a campaign e-mail, please look there.  No further acknowledgment will be sent.

If you are writing about the “Give us the Internet we need” campaign, please let me have a copy of any substantive reply you receive.  If you have a specific problem with your own broadband connection, please let me have full details, including your full name, address, telephone number, BT account number and a description of the problem you are experiencing.  I will then pursue the issue with BT.

If you have not already done so, please supply your full postal address and telephone number.  I will be unable to deal with your concerns without this information.

Yours sincerely,

Rt Hon David Jones MP

House of Commons
Westminster
LONDON
SW1A 0AA
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HOMECOMING

Those of you who have passed the homestead over the past couple of weeks will have noticed that all the blinds were drawn and the windows firmly closed.  Apart from the essential security aspect of our  goings on we have been away on a short sojurn to our usual holiday resort.  The weather, booze and food were all to our satisfaction but we were pleased to get home and find that the house had not been taken over by foriegn squatters!  Any house with windows shut and blinds drawn must attract the inteest of burglars and the like as it is a clear indication that the house is not attended.

Of course, it is a part of our live to disapppear from the home town at  regular times to use the "extra"  income we get from our business.  Everyone must know that a retail business is the most convenient way of pocketting that little extra to spend on the luxuries of life.  It is easy to generate this little extra by just over declaring losses through soilage or shoplifting.   Or selling the stock purchased directly from the reps for cash.   Often this can be a great way to deal with greeting cards or sandwiches, although the different avenues are many.  Can't say whether I do this or not.   Having been provided with a good living, due to my father's generosity, I am very well heeled and in no need of exploiting fiddles, or obtaining goods that have fallen off the back of a lorry.

I will leave all that sort of thing to other dishonest individuals.
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ARTIST UNKNOWN

How remiss of me!  Some time ago, someone decided to embellish these two cars by covering them with a description of that green stuff that grows on my lawn.  Since then I have completely forgotten to thank them for the quick and quiet way the work was carried out.  An expert clean up and some spit and polish, all paid for by the insurance company, put them back in their previous condition.
However, it is requested that the exercise is not repeated, as my friendly pals in the force were unable to trace the artist.

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OSCAR'S LITTLE HELPER AND INFLUENTIAL MP

The next Chapter in this Blog of Revelations is David Ian Jones MP, a Solicitor of this town, Christian (or so he professes), failed Secretary of State for Wales, freemason (with a small f), admired by a few and hated by many.

David came into my life long before the Thoughts of Oscar blog was mooted.  I have known him for many a year in his professional capacity, although I have never rated him as being amonst the top briefs in the area.

Although his business life is not very interesting, his private leisure time, and activities create much interest to those who are also of the same ilk.
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Not the best photos, but a comparison that definitely illustrates the "other side" of his nature.  What you see on the surface is not always what you get in reality!

David's ambition was to become Prime Minister and he set out on the task by getting himself elected to the Welsh Assembly, due mainly to a chance happening when In 2002, he unexpectedly became a member of the Welsh Assembly for the North Wales electoral region, filling the seat vacated by the ex-Welsh Office minister Rod Richards, who had resigned for health reasons.  In retrospect it is a pity that Rod had to vacate the seat!   During his time as an MP so far, David Jones' career path has been far from exciting and his performance in the House unremarkable.  He has also been the  the subject of a few embarrassing and questionable incidents.

In 2013 it was reported that Jones took a chauffeur-driven Jaguar on a journey of about 100 metres, a total mis-use of an MP's facility.   He also found it necessary to repay the amount of £80+K in respect of, according to him, wrongly claiming for his London accommodation.   Look at his expenses and you will see he claims every penny he can and is like many MP's got his snout firmly in the trough.

David Jones also seems to lack in diplomacy!  During an interview on ITV Wales Face to Face programme, discussing the Parliamentary vote on the Marriage (Same Sex Couples) Bill in February, Jones said, "I was one of two cabinet ministers who did vote against it and it was for various reasons. Certainly in constituency terms, I felt that overwhelmingly the constituents of Clwyd West were opposed to the change. But also I regard marriage as an institution that has developed over many centuries, essentially for the provision of a warm and safe environment for the upbringing of children, which is clearly something that two same-sex partners can’t do. Which is not to say that I’m in any sense opposed to stable and committed same-sex partnerships".    What a load of toffee he spouts, does he live on another planet?   The gay rights organisation Stonewall, which in 2010 had given Jones a score of 14% in favour of lesbian, gay and bisexual equality, issued a statement expressing great sadness about his comments, and I agree with them, David's comments that is.

In 2014 Jones was accused by fellow MP Guto Bebb of being co-author of the blog "Thoughts of Oscar".   Jones denied having anything to do with the blog, for which local yours  truly had claimed full responsibility. Richie Windmill, a leader of the "Victims of Oscar" action group, was arrested in October 2015, along with his wife, on suspicion of harassment of me and the mrs, but were both released without charge. They claimed the arrest was arranged by David Jones through his Police friends, as an act of revenge for their complaints about the blog, me and Jones.  We just gave our mates in the force the details and they did the rest.   Not a very good outcome for us but we gave the Windmills a bad turn.

Jones was also revealed as the owner of a Twitter account in which the actions of prime minister David Cameron regarding the referendum were heavily criticised in early 2016.  It was discovered that David Jones had set up the bogus account in order that the PM and the MP's would not be aware that he was arguing against the party line.

All in all David has been an excellent contributor and supported of my Internet activities even though he will probably continue denying the fact until his dying day.   I have already taken the blame for myself, so I may as well take it for everyone else too, including  Ruby, Steve, Jonathon, Chris, Ian, Dave2  and everyone else who took enjoyment from the Blog.
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